Someone's knocking, but nobody's home...

I'm going to lay this out bluntly here, sometimes when I'm in the Word and spending time with God I feel as though I'm watching paint dry. I'm not impacted, impressed, changed, or exhorted. I walk away the same as I came. Why is that? Can you relate? Today, my perspective on this changed, probably forever.

I was reading in Matthew starting in Chapter 5 this morning with a regular ol' piece of college ruled paper by my side. I thought to myself, "okay, whatever comes to my mind as I read, I'm going to write it down: verses, convictions, thoughts about the Person of God....anything." As I was doing this,  I realized something:  If I'm coming unengaged, then I will leave unchanged. When I looked at Bible engaged in what it said (not just reading it like the newspaper), the words came alive. My paper is practically FULL of prayers, convictions and praises for who God is, questions about the world and how stinkin' hard it is to live in it - things like that. Think about it, if you are married or have a best friend, do you sit down with them and just wait for them to say something meaningful or interesting? Or do you rather engage in the conversation - starting and ending some, adding to comments, sharing thoughts or ideas? Yeah, sounds more like spending time with someone doesn't it? If I sat on the couch with my husband and was completely unengaged- just spending time with him because I knew it was a good thing (or something I'm supposed to do), there wouldn't be much of a relationship there. If you are saying to yourself "Well duh, girly"then be patient with me, I'm a little slow at times. ;)

I believe the same is true of our relationship with our Husband, Christ. He wants to talk to us, in other words - He is not the problem! But if we come to Jesus with our left over energy, what will we be in a position to hear? Sometimes that's a great place, because we are empty and He alone can fill us, but our hearts have to be in a position to be filled. When they are not, we get the "watching paint dry" feeling. So in a sense, "Someone is knocking, but nobody is home." Well, I hear the Knocker now and I'm excited for this new chapter in my time in the Word to begin!

If you have the "watching paint dry feeling" would you consider grabbing a piece of paper and spending time in God's Word engaged?  Maybe you already know of this secret and you have other thoughts about engaging in God's Word- please leave a comment - I'd love to have this conversation.

Sometimes it's the simple "Ah-ha!" moments that can really make a large change in our spiritual life. I thank God for his never ending patience with me.

Encouraged,
R

Toned arms...

Lately I've been thinking that I need to build up my arms, sounds funny for a girl to say that. I don't mean that I want be like Hulk Hogan, but I'd like to be stronger and more lean. Nothing wrong with that, right? Summer is coming and I'll be doing more yard work so I'll need some strength built up for that... Sleeveless shirts and dresses are on the way, so out-with-the-flab-in-with-the-toned!
Recently David and I were sitting on the couch and he decided to read Proverbs 31 to me as an encouragement (not as a hint or lecture, I know what you're thinking..ha!), he is always so encouraging to me. Daily he let's me know that I am " the MOST beautiful" to him and that is just what I need to hear. I know he means more in calling me beautiful than just having toned arms (because I don't right now- ha!) he means I'm beautiful to him on the inside and outside. Well, when he finished reading Proverbs 31, I was left pondering a few verses and they have stuck to my heart for the last several days.
So Pintrest and I are BFF's, we're tight. Tonight I took one of my "Pins" and brought it to life. I took a picture frame, took out the picture and replaced it with white paper. I used a black dry erase marker and wrote this verse Proverbs 31:24:
Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. (ESV)
 and it's hanging in our bedroom now...and this next verse has been on my heart too (Prov 3:17)...
She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. (ESV)
Awesome. See, it's Biblical to have toned arms! Okay, so that's kind of stretching it. Thankfully God doesn't think like I do. He means so much more than looking nice for my husband in the new sundress, he is talking about strength for Him, and for my family. When life comes knocking at the Proverbs 31 Woman's door, she is ready - for anything. In fact she is so ready that when life hits, she doesn't just get back up again, she laughs. Joy! She knows who her Maker is, what her purpose is and life doesn't threaten that. Whoa. Could I friend her on Facebook? I have a lot to learn from this girl. I bet she likes coffee too.
The cool thing - King Lemuel's mom was describing someone that he could find, she's rare (v.10) but she's out there. I can be that girl! Right now, in my life, in my home, in my relationship with my husband I can be the Proverbs 31 woman. That's so encouraging to me. The best part, her strength doesn't come from some storehouse she built in the field she purchased, it comes from God. It's Him. He fills her cup, pours her out and when she's empty is there with open arms and a gentle voice saying "come to Me... I will give you rest." She is a hard worker, but her work is for The Maker. I hope this encourages you too...

Guilt

Guilt, the false kind, is a non-conventional "four letter word" to me. It is a thief.  It's a lier, and because it's a lier, you never know when to believe it because there is real guilt, and false guilt. Guilt sneaks into your being, like carbon monoxide. It can kill you before you realize what it is. It's something that every person is faced with at some point in their lifetime. You can ignore it, or invite it in. If you ignore it, it will continue to haunt you, it never tires. If you invite it in, it now has the potential to run your life.

Guilty. This is a completely different word. It can be both true and false, depending on the situation. Feeling guilty can have many of the same affects as guilt. Being guilty is something that proceeds consequence.

It amazes me that Jesus and I both have experienced guilt. The difference is that His was unwarranted, he took MY guilt. I am much different, I stood naked, filthy and shameful before a Holy God and Jesus, God's own Son stood in between God and I, before the holiness of God could consume me.  Jesus willingly took all the shame, all the sorrow, all the guilt, all the condemnation that I have from my sin and the guiltiness that I earned from my sin. He literally wore it along with his cross and there, I lost my guilt. There a Holy God-Man chose to love me when when I didn't love him back. There, I became beloved, chosen, His.

Why then do I create my own guilt? Why do I look to God and say "I'm not enough for you!" when he already knows that, and Jesus is my identity now. Because we have an accuser. Satan is always there to accuse us before God and ourselves, making us feel inadequate and unworthy. We forget that we are purchased by His blood, "all our sin are washed away, the night has turned to day".

Oh! To have this etched into the deepest rifts in my heart:

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. ² For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. 

God's Word... so much to learn. What are your thoughts?....